Thursday, June 21, 2007

Just feeling sad today, I am entitled

For some reason I am feeling sad today. It could be because I went back to the OB today to make sure my ovaries aren't over stimulated, which they are not so good. It was just a little upsetting to have to be going there and not be pregnant. I got a prescription for 100 mg of clomid with 3 refills- so 4 rounds. He wants me to do this round that I already started, then another next month and if not pregnant that round, take a month off to have an endometrial (?) biopsy done to make sure I am actually ovulating.... I think I am. I am assuming that I will still take clomid that month so that I ovulate so when they check if I am ovulating they are seeing if the clomid is working. I asked if we could do a blood test but he said this is the best way. I am not thrilled about taking a month off, but maybe I will arrange it so that its a month that my due date wouldn't be the greatest... even though he told me 2 rounds including this one... but he gave me my prescription with 3 refills. I really don't want to be due in July, August, September, maybe even October because then I have a real stinky maternity leave... I know, can't be picky but I am going to want to stay home with my baby! So hopefully it won't have to come to that and I will get pregnant in the next couple months... this month my due date would be March I think, then the next would be April, then May, those are all good months, so HOPEFULLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FINGERS CROSSED!!!!!!!

Joe came home later from golfing. After Conner went to bed he wanted to cuddle with me, thats fine. He didn't even ask about my appointment, obviously he forgot. I told him I was feeling very sad today and I don't like feeling that way. I was crying. He asked if it was about Leah, and I said sort of, Leah, getting pregnant, losing weight, wanting to eat all the time (the last few days/week), just everything. All he said was sorry. He said I was looking really skinny (I am not but I have lost around 10 lbs). But thats all he did was say sorry and hug me, thats great and all but I want him to try and make me feel better, say something else besides sorry, give me a pep talk, something. So I am still kind of blah today (I didn't finish this post all in one day, it is now the next day) I have things I want to get done, organize more stuff for the yard sale, price it,exercise, clean a little bit of the living room and dining room and sweep up and vacuum up some of the insulation that is everywhere. But I have a feeling I won't be so productive. I am just so bummed right now. It stinks. :(

2 comments:

Tina said...

I am sorry you are feeling so blah today. It sucks all of this piling up at once.

Question: Can't your ob/gyn do an u/s to check on your follies from time to time? If he did an u/s to check for cysts, I would think he could do that too. When I do Clomid, it is a MUST with my doc. That way, you know what is going on.

Also, when is he going to consider moving you to stims? It seems that, after several rounds of Clomid at the same dose, either you need to increase the dose or change the med.

E-mail me with questions... It doesn't seem your doc is being as hard-assed about this as he should.

(((hugs)))

mom2themoose said...

Hey Dianne!
I'm so glad you found my blog. I haven't talked to you in too long. It's been very crazy around here. Hey, i was checkign your blog and discovered you and I have one more thing in common. Our families are friends! My dad was at your uncle's wake and it turns out he has known your parents for ages. I guess even your grandparents and my grandparents were friends. How freaky is that?

Anyway, just wanted to check in and say hi and that I'm thinking of you. I hope that you get pregnant VERY soon. You so deserve it. I hope your DS and your little Leah have a baby brother or sister safely at home with you soon.
:) melissa